Friday, December 22, 2006

Happy Generic Holiday Season!

Whooo! It's that time of year again. Merry Fucking X-Mas.


Chris UK said...

A Merry Rubbery Christmas to you too! May all your stockings be latex!

Anima said...

woah ho ho,
I don't know if that's christmas spirit or bad nog. Either way, I hope you enjoy today! Also, I checked the pix on the baroness's site... and honestly, your outfit looked the best. too bad you were a judge!

I'm gonna have to get something custom made by you. will you accept 円(yen?)

Bill "Gomez" Lemieux said...

Hi friends,

We wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to our friends, but it is so difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So we have consulted extensively with our attorneys, and on their advice we wish to say the following:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the solstice holiday, practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of
others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that our country is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, political and ideological convictions, or
sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:

This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher(s) to actually implement any of the wishes for our/theirselves or others, is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher(s). This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual
application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher(s).

Disclaimer: No trees were harmed in the sending of this message; however, a significant number of electrons were slightly inconvenienced.



Found floating on the web, and subsequently stolen, edited, plagiarized, and re-written to suit my purposes without remorse or credit to the (unknown) original author.